Ahoy !! … My dear friends! Romans! and Countrymen!… Wait! Before you get any kind of ponder pangs… let me clarify… I am not even remotely associated with the ‘Maino’ clan neither am I associated with any political party, for that matter, so don’t get carried away. The media houses of our country are doing a great job, in fact this media caliphate led by the Kumars, the Dutts and the Sardesais (the cavalcade is growing even bigger after that crappy draconian demonetization doctrine… which … makes sense due to obvious reasons) have played a major role in raising the awareness quotient of the masses by bringing every major event of the country to the public eye without any biases and preconceived notions .. and many  times they even crossed the border to show their commitment. Every time I watch these flag bearers of the brigade presenting some news or issue … I am in a state of awe and I start getting auditory hallucinations … such as a big round of applause in an amphitheatre … ummmmm!…. sounds like creepy paracusia though … But I do bow down to the way these media caliphs bring out a well articulated news. Hats off!!

Talking of the recent happenings across the latitudes and longitudes of the country, these media Caliphs have very justifiably covered and brought to notice, the major events hitting the socio-economic nerve of the country just like release of Amir’s Dangal, Pappu providing evidence of corruption against PM and the most important news of the year .. Saifeena delivering their baby, Taimur. They have very appropriately deprecated the less important issues like Dhulagarh riots in Bengal and the communal riots in Imphal. And they have very rightly done so… Wow !! this is called journalism … after all money is everything … I mean not everything.

Yes! these news are really less important where one peaceful secular community burns thousands of houses of a non-secular, rogue and radical community people. Ugh! … whats so new about it .. even earlier this year there was Kalichuk in Malda town also in Didi’s West Bengal … did anything get reported or talked about, for that incident? such stray incidents do happen … we should not pay heed to such trivial events. Only antinational media houses will show and talk about such incidents ..Remember that bugger .. Mr. Goswami… what happened to him? … Just look a year back!!… Dadri was such a big event where one secular peace messenger of God was lynched.. and was so majestically and gracefully covered by all the secular and nationalist media houses .. and you are talking about Dhulagarh? … where only less than fifty people killed and just nearing a couple hundred seriously injured and properties of worth crores turned to ashes ..Naah!! … Let’s focus on some bigger news friends. The bigger news of the day is Saifeena has delivered Taimur !! … this is some kind of national news .. and you are still stuck with Dhulagarh !!

Meanwhile, Didi claimed that all these stray incidents are happening due to PM’s draconian doctrine of demonetization and I totally support her … don’t you see her state of mind post demonetization? We have no right torture her any further… after all, she is the one who has lost all her white money which she kept for financing her further elections. She also claims that situation is under control … of course !! that is under her control. After all, she is the CM elected by the secular people of Bengal.

Also, some irrational anonymous caller just called in Mr. Sardesai and asked him to show some news on unrest and riots in Bengal which Mr. Sardesai, rejected outrightly and he rightly did so, by saying that there is an absolute peace in Bengal and nothing is happening there of such kind. He was further heard saying that the man was misled by the Zee news’ antinational telecasts.
Oh Yes ! .. don’t you hear that? … those are the peace messengers of God who are on the peace mission … so what they enjoy higher percentage of population in the area and are demographically a majority there … they are still minority … and so what the platoons of RAF has been deployed there ?… they have been asked not to take any action against the Peace Messengers…
And how dare you even ask such favors from Mr. Sardesai? don’t you know that he is one of the most unbiased, rationale journalists? He has won accolades not only on the national level but also at international level from the likes of Haafiz Saeed.

Forget about Dhulagarh … let’s stay focused on some more important and happening news in the country. Let’s talk about Raees!

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